• 11 Posts
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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 3rd, 2023

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  • My ISA Fritz! ISDN card fucking killed me…
    I could, and did, live with the terminal for quite some while, surfing with Links, listening to music and even watching videos. Besides the obvious open IIRC chat in one terminal.
    But the Fritz Card was horrible to setup. I need to say, that it was ok, when it worked, but as far as I remember, I needed to compile the kernel with support for it and afterwards needed to configure some memory or bus addresses somewhere.

    As this was my only computer as a teenager, this was just a horrific experience. Cutting myself off from the information live line multiple times until I got it right.
    Also setting up dual boot the first time was a fun adventure…


  • Well, that’s how my business trips usually look like.

    Work outside of usual production, but still somehow watch and verify your changes during production the next day, maybe producing hot-fixes, and trying to get some sleep until you can do your tests of changes at night, after you hopefully have swallowed all the fucking log data with a beer - and sometimes 2 and something stronger.

    Then you go to bed with an unresolved issue, wake up during the night with some kind of wacky dreamed up solution.
    Without any other option you hack it in, and it miraculously works.

    Then you go home and sleep - until some support call disturbs your Zen and you’re helplessly confused again …











  • Legalization has only positives

    People who need something, to get through the day, will always seek for some kind of crutch.

    When the legal range of available products (sorry, just learned, that the word “Sortiment” doesn’t have a nice English equivalent) aren’t helping ones issue, they’ll look for other sources.
    But unregulated sources can bring multiple problems with it.

    First off, and the thing, I care about most:
    we’d/we do hurt people looking for some kind of help.
    Either by directly reducing their sources of crutches to untrustable and dangerous ones, with a product that’s very probably not clean and could damage the user in unintended ways, they aren’t aware about. We need to provide a safety net for people with problems, and not stigmatize those who try to help themselves.
    And I’ve never met an addict, that was just an addict for the sake of it, or the feeling of the first time was so great - ok, maybe once I did.
    But in every other case, the only ones getting hooked are the ones, that finally felt good with themselves for once in their life, when they somehow introduced some drug into their system.
    And that’s why many of them say, it was that feeling of the first time, they always try to reproduce.
    For a normal happy person, heroin wouldn’t make much of a difference.
    But if you’re feeling unloved and alone, hurt and abused, when you’re feeling lost and don’t know what to do, than end yourself.
    Well then, then heroin (or whatever helps your cause) will give you a new perspective of life.
    This escape from overwhelming, oppressive, suffocation problems is it, why people get hooked on drugs.

    There is just nothing wrong with recreational use, as long as it’s just about boosting a good time or even better, use mind altering drugs in a ritual setting, to change your perspective on things and learn (again) that love and your lives ones are the center of your life - or discover, that there was always one thing, that you wanted to do. Doesn’t matter, if it gives you more options and happiness in life, it wasn’t bad.
    Bad it is for the people who cling to it, because only on it, they feel like functioning normal.

    Those people have actual drug problems, and even with crystal meth the statistics say, that only a few percent (we’re talking 1-2%) get addicted.
    (At least that’s, what I saw and remember - proof me wrong) And we have to keep in mind what social stigma fucking crystal meth has!
    The group of people doing it (and show up on those statistics) are mostly people, that are already looking for such experiences and have stepped over the border of social tolerance, but look for their own thing (either enjoyment or escape/help)
    And there is pretty much no one, who ever just started with meth (or other hard drugs, like heroin) . In the most cases there was at least alcohol and probably cigarettes/nicotine involved - there are absolutely always exceptions, but that doesn’t change much, what needs to change in our social system.
    As tragic, as those exceptions are, those usually happen in groups, where people with problematic drug use already gather.
    So, solving the problem of the mass, should also help to reduce those sad exceptions.

    Ok, I’ve started a bigger second point, but the only thing left I have are those few words, trying to start describing an idea:
    “Then we need to look into the individual”

    Well,… I hope the first point is sufficient, and if I ever remember what I wanted to say else, I’ll come back here ;⁠-⁠)
    So kids, you see, don’t abuse drugs, else you won’t remember shit… - although my mother has the same problem, and never in her live did anything illicit.
    So I can’t say with confidence, that we can talk about causation.

    But, what hurt my mind most, were social traumata (e.g. a Burnout), and drugs (and many exercises like meditation) exceptionally helped my mental state and ability to handle life and work despite my handicap.
    As I said, as long as I actively work on a problem and use drugs in a ritual state, they are helping me.
    As soon as I need them just to get through the day, then I’m having a problem, I’m trying to avoid.

    I know, this is mostly about me, but talking with other users, I’ve mostly seen the same mindset.














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